1 November 2010

Today has been a pretty crappy day.

It started so promisingly. The man turned up on time to sort out my heating, and then I set off to work. Parking space at the station, no problem.

I had about 5 minutes before the train. I knew I needed to get some cigarettes, so decided not to try for the train, have a smoke, get the next one.

As I walked down the platform, I was wobbly, really wobbly. I was falling against the wall, the posts, anything handy along the platform. I knew I had over 20 minutes before my train, so no rush. I just needed to make it to the bench, then sit down and rest. Wait for the train.

About 2 yards from the bench, I lost it. My stick was in the wrong place to support me, and I feel forward onto my face. Strange really, as I've generally fallen backwards. So there I was, flat on my face on the floor. Thinking to myself “how did this happen?” Odd really, how things look from down there. To be honest, I could quite happily have stayed there. I was comfortable, it wasn't cold.

But I knew that if I did, someone would ask if I was ok, maybe call an ambulance, certainly cause a fuss. I hate fuss.

So I carefully hauled myself to my feet and manoeuvred myself onto the bench. Whilst I was doing that, the kindly station staff lady was there, asking if I was ok. I love the fact that people are so nice, but I hate it at the same time. It would be fine if they (and I) were helping someone else. Anybody else. But no, it was me.