8 September 2009
It has been a few weeks since I posted last, and I feel little guilty - not because I feel any obligation to my blog, but because there are a lot of things that I want to say, and I know that memories become distorted by the passage of time.
It has been a fun few weeks. I have concluded that my energy levels are closely linked to my general happiness. I suppose that's only natural, since I recall the MS nurse (who is lovely, I may have mentioned this before) told me I should avoid stress - so the corollary should be that the opposite should also be true.
My boys got their exam results, and I couldn't have been more proud of them - both for their achievements and for the way in which they reacted to them. They continue to be the greatest joy in my life.
I am dating again, which has always made me happy. True, it has invariably ended in me becoming quite unhappy, and often in an undignified fashion, but this time feels different. Different because for once I have my eyes well and truly open, but also because at last the MS seems to be stable - so my new partner knows, pretty much anyway, that how I am now is how I will be for the foreseeable future. Which reminds me. It's now been about a year since my last relapse. Now that's an anniversary I don't mind celebrating.
But to return to the dating. She's a nurse, which is kind of cool because she knows about MS from a professional standpoint, but is also very pragmatic about it. She gives me the space I need, and the consideration, without being overbearing or crushing my independence. And she nags me about crossing my legs or my ankles. Yes, yes, I know it's a bad thing for me to be doing (and I've just uncrossed them. Again) but it's so natural and comfortable. And it irks me to be having to sit a little less comfortably whilst others around me are happily crossing their legs. But a little disapproving look from her and I know what to do. Mind you, it's pretty much the only instruction I'll take from her, so that's alright really!
So all in all life is decidedly peachy. Next week I go to Sydney to see my dearest friends and whilt the timing could have been better (in view of my having, yet again, just started a new relationship - for which I will no doubt be ribbed mercilessly any time I mention her) it's been far too long since I saw my favourite Aussie girls. This time I will miss my boys, as always, and miss my gorgeous girl, but I will be happy to see my friends and to share in their lives again, for a little while.
It occurred to me recently that I have become at ease with my MS. It hasn't been an easy journey, and has at times been pretty painful, but for the first time I feel that 'we' understand one another. I respect the MS, give it due consideration, and it leaves me alone, mostly, to get on with my life. Not a happy marriage by any means, but a tolerable one
It has been a fun few weeks. I have concluded that my energy levels are closely linked to my general happiness. I suppose that's only natural, since I recall the MS nurse (who is lovely, I may have mentioned this before) told me I should avoid stress - so the corollary should be that the opposite should also be true.
My boys got their exam results, and I couldn't have been more proud of them - both for their achievements and for the way in which they reacted to them. They continue to be the greatest joy in my life.
I am dating again, which has always made me happy. True, it has invariably ended in me becoming quite unhappy, and often in an undignified fashion, but this time feels different. Different because for once I have my eyes well and truly open, but also because at last the MS seems to be stable - so my new partner knows, pretty much anyway, that how I am now is how I will be for the foreseeable future. Which reminds me. It's now been about a year since my last relapse. Now that's an anniversary I don't mind celebrating.
But to return to the dating. She's a nurse, which is kind of cool because she knows about MS from a professional standpoint, but is also very pragmatic about it. She gives me the space I need, and the consideration, without being overbearing or crushing my independence. And she nags me about crossing my legs or my ankles. Yes, yes, I know it's a bad thing for me to be doing (and I've just uncrossed them. Again) but it's so natural and comfortable. And it irks me to be having to sit a little less comfortably whilst others around me are happily crossing their legs. But a little disapproving look from her and I know what to do. Mind you, it's pretty much the only instruction I'll take from her, so that's alright really!
So all in all life is decidedly peachy. Next week I go to Sydney to see my dearest friends and whilt the timing could have been better (in view of my having, yet again, just started a new relationship - for which I will no doubt be ribbed mercilessly any time I mention her) it's been far too long since I saw my favourite Aussie girls. This time I will miss my boys, as always, and miss my gorgeous girl, but I will be happy to see my friends and to share in their lives again, for a little while.
It occurred to me recently that I have become at ease with my MS. It hasn't been an easy journey, and has at times been pretty painful, but for the first time I feel that 'we' understand one another. I respect the MS, give it due consideration, and it leaves me alone, mostly, to get on with my life. Not a happy marriage by any means, but a tolerable one
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